Monday 12 March 2012

Wanted

Seeking a replacement for my motivation which has suddenly gone missing.  Said motivation has been replaced with an approximately 17 pound muffin top, shortness of breath when walking distances of more than a foot and sleepless nights punctuated with the most bizarr-o dreams outside of Tim Burton's REM cycle. Limited budget prevents an actual paid transaction for any motivation you may be selling, but a trade is possible.  Upon receipt of your gently used motivation, I will bake you a batch of the most delicious chocolate chip cookies you have ever eaten. It will not be a full batch, as I will have undoubtedly eaten several dozen, but still.
Interested parties may contact me by phone or email, which I will have my husband respond to. 


Ugh!  Seriously - I have no energy for anything.  I know everyone says this, but I can't imagine the steep decline that is yet to come over the next seven weeks. Neither can Jimmy.  My digestion is also lacking motivation, and so I am rarely hungry at dinner time.  It would take way too much energy to prepare a meal that I have no interest in eating, so it's been toast, fruit and yogurt at the timely hour of eight o'clock 'round these parts, poor guy.  He's really missing his meat and potatoes.
Never mind the decline in motivation and productivity, my supportive spouse and I are having a hard time imagining what my mega sized muffin top will look like in seven weeks.  In my opinion, James could have kept his horror to himself, but he never does.  Last night, wide eyed in amazement he declared, "I think you're going to be as big as a house by the end of this!"  He later amended this statement of love and support by adding, "It's just that you're still small everywhere else!  It's going to have to go somewhere!"  Indeed.  
If only I had this kind of airbrushing available to me at all times, because one of these things is not like the other.  Really - click these links, it's worth the energy needed to tap the mouse.  I wouldn't lie about what is or is not worthwhile energy expenditure in my current state.
Rest assured that I will work up enough energy to ask Jimmy to turn on the TV so that I might turn my eyes toward the screen to take in The Bachelor finale.  I can't wait!
Shelby

2 comments:

  1. Well you did quite well writing this blog! Better than playing Angry Birds half the day! Lol

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  2. If you are looking to James to respond to emails or phone calls you will never get your hands on any gently used motivation. Father emailed him Sunday and he still hasn't heard from him! You two are in a canoe without a clue and no paddle, too. But, alas and alark, I can offer some motivation. It's time for another fashion shoot!!! Written from my tempurpedic at 10:05 in the AM.

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